careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I skipped work to stalk him.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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