Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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