Texts From Last Night

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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial

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  (908): i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial http://tfl.nu/oypl
  Replies (6) Good night (1506) Bad night (514)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.

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  (770): Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird. http://tfl.nu/gky6
  Replies (23) Good night (476) Bad night (4250)
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  (619): View more from California

  You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.

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  (619): You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on. http://tfl.nu/5706
  Replies (3) Good night (4090) Bad night (495)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.

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  (573): my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake. http://tfl.nu/nq7t
  Replies (49) Good night (2204) Bad night (4483)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?

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  (917): Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage? http://tfl.nu/cpvo
  Replies (12) Good night (5409) Bad night (774)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.

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  (717): Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me. http://tfl.nu/6xgz
  Replies (39) Good night (837) Bad night (7509)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!

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  (501): Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?! http://tfl.nu/d2jg
  Replies (5) Good night (822) Bad night (2313)
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  (619): View more from California

  We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.

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  (619): We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend. http://tfl.nu/mtuw
  Replies (4) Good night (1938) Bad night (631)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Are we still banned from the library?

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  (313): Are we still banned from the library? http://tfl.nu/xtiu
  Replies (12) Good night (2366) Bad night (655)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook

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  (303): Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook http://tfl.nu/i5be
  Replies (5) Good night (494) Bad night (1456)
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  (941): View more from Florida

  All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.

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  (941): All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave. http://tfl.nu/74ql
  Replies (3) Good night (594) Bad night (1132)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...

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  (503): Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat... http://tfl.nu/b2lc
  Replies (2) Good night (407) Bad night (1051)
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  (650): View more from California

  Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around

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  (650): Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around http://tfl.nu/5sia
  Replies (1) Good night (282) Bad night (135)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.

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  (519): It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms. http://tfl.nu/hfjv
  Replies (0) Good night (684) Bad night (184)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?

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  (248): Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents? http://tfl.nu/sosc
  Replies (1) Good night (317) Bad night (144)

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