How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
