Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
