help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize