I hate your face
my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?