Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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