Texts From Last Night

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  (905): View more from Toronto

  I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"

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  (905): I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me" http://tfl.nu/rxcz
  Replies (15) Good night (1025) Bad night (2465)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?

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  (647): Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public? http://tfl.nu/9yr1
  Replies (33) Good night (1724) Bad night (4753)
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  (807): View more from Ontario

  her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me

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  (807): her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me http://tfl.nu/f0ty
  Replies (15) Good night (4554) Bad night (1099)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  remember, YOU ARE A WINNER

  (410): View more from Maryland

  my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.

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  (520): remember, YOU ARE A WINNER (410): my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice. http://tfl.nu/siqr
  Replies (11) Good night (1475) Bad night (3255)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.

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  (901): She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas. http://tfl.nu/43pp
  Replies (2) Good night (1384) Bad night (947)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.

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  (503): Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow. http://tfl.nu/26gh
  Replies (10) Good night (1807) Bad night (706)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.

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  (571): How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back. http://tfl.nu/nr6f
  Replies (3) Good night (3328) Bad night (839)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?

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  (205): Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that? http://tfl.nu/yb0a
  Replies (4) Good night (2043) Bad night (593)
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  (310): View more from California

  Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"

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  (310): Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there" http://tfl.nu/gk1u
  Replies (3) Good night (1435) Bad night (674)
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  (760): View more from California

  Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.

  (818): View more from California

  That was one of the best texts I got today

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  (760): Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner. (818): That was one of the best texts I got today http://tfl.nu/vb5p
  Replies (7) Good night (1860) Bad night (526)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.

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  (832): And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking. http://tfl.nu/dun3
  Replies (3) Good night (787) Bad night (508)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it

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  (267): Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it http://tfl.nu/yaso
  Replies (0) Good night (410) Bad night (624)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here

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  (618): Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here http://tfl.nu/y9wz
  Replies (6) Good night (571) Bad night (360)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.

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  (570): I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now. http://tfl.nu/p9px
  Replies (1) Good night (362) Bad night (619)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!

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  (306): the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful! http://tfl.nu/h1ft
  Replies (0) Good night (601) Bad night (306)

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