it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
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