I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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