D3 body, D1 cock
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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