I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
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Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
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Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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