So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
You can't just leave with hair like that
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
