bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
