Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
