I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
love makes seman taste better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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