the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
This toilet bowl is my home.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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