it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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