Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
