i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
