Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
