I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
