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• (678): View more from Georgia

  That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance

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• (315): View more from New York

  i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.

  (1-240): View more from Maryland

  Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...

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• (260): View more from Indiana

  After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone

  (385): View more from Utah

  At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???

  (801): View more from Utah

  In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.

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