Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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