wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
