I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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