I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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