Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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