Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
