my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
