i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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