ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Randomize
