There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
