girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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