you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
