Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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