I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize