absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
