My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
