There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
