While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
