is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize