he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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