He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
