why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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