Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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