You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
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