What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
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