The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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