the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
