He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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