the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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